Exit Process

Outside of Al Ain, UAE

It has been a long time since I've written anything...

Well, last year I had a really tough time emotionally (for various reasons) and wasn't even sure what to say anymore, so I had kind of given up commenting on my situation here in Dubai. I've also mostly given up talking about the American political situation, as it has gotten so depressing, insane and scary. Since I haven't been able to do much from here, it is just waiting and watching and trying to stay informed with real news. Mueller Report anyone?

Hopefully, once I am home, I can find some ways to take constructive action!

And that is my big news! After almost eight years, I am finally leaving the Middle East for good this time. July 4th (of all days) is my "Independence Day!" We are still going to be working, but it's the last day of school. And then I will be free! Funny enough, as excited as I am, I'm finding that as difficult as it was to come here, it is even more difficult to leave. When I came it was with a sense of excitement and embracing the unknown, now I am leaving with a big question as to what has been accomplished along with so many mixed emotions. Nevertheless, I have no regrets about making this move, as it really has been the adventure of a lifetime and I have met so many wonderful people along the way.

Also, there are camels. 

But it is definitely time to come home!

The problem for me is that at times it feels excruciating to let go of my life here. This proves to me again, if I ever had any doubts, that I would never have made it as a Bedouin. To have the ability to pack up and go, cyclically and predictably, without carrying a lot of baggage, no, I would have died.

                                                         From Thesiger's Journeys

Now that I am repatriating, there won't be the coming back and forth anymore and always feeling like I am living two separate lives. Although I have to say, going home brings on sensations of near panic that my days of travel are over, and it is true, I may never make it back to Nepal or Bali or even the South of France. Talk about the fear of missing out!

View from Kopan Monastery, Nepal 2015

                                                      Ubud, Bali in February 2018

La Roane in the South of France

It feels like I am giving up a lot, by leaving. Not to mention packing up my apartment. This has proved to be quite a challenge for me. Although I have been studying my Marie Kondo, the dilemma is that practically everything I have acquired since I came here "sparks joy" in me.  So it just doesn't seem to be working. I told myself I wouldn't acquire things, but I did. Now it's sorting, packing, giving away, selling, and slowly freeing myself to travel back. I could use some help, but it seems I'm really on my own in this. There is also an incredible amount of bureaucratic red tape (banking, shutting off the utilities, visa cancellations, etc.) to get through in order to exit this place, which I am not at all sure how to accomplish. Yes, I am doing a lot of whining too, just haven't been doing much of it out loud. A lot of my life here has been like that. Everything is a private joke with myself. Not a sustainable way to live, take it from me!

Packing Up Apartment 

The truth is, a lot of people living here complain of the sense of isolation and loneliness. I will not miss these feelings and I will be forever grateful for the connections I have been able to make, especially with the 5 rhythms tribe in Dubai and the women I met in Sports City. When I was wondering how I would survive, I found some real community. Thank God for that!

My job, I had to let it go. I did what I could and I hope I did some good. I know I grew, in spite of myself. I will miss the kids but I have high hopes for all of them. They are amazing and way more resilient and adaptable to change than I could ever hope to be.

At any rate, I am bringing home as little baggage as I can, but I know what comes with me will need to be dealt with...

I think I found him 
(but can I say I am a little scared?)

Going forward, you will find me here: 

at the Prior Patch, in Bradenton, Florida! 

Brand New Chapter - Chris and Skip - 2019

I just need to remember to breathe!  

Bye, bye Dubai! 

xoxo, Chris